


the wolf and the lamb.

by rmartin



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Violence, Established Relationship, M/M, Multi, Murder, Protective Kylo Ren, Sexual Fantasy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-10-21 18:35:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17647766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rmartin/pseuds/rmartin
Summary: It was one of Ren's fantasies. He confessed to Hux shortly after they decided that what was between the two of them could have a name – a relationship of some kind. Ren claimed he didn't have a preference when it came to color. Red or black – maybe even blue to match Hux's eyes or white – because the white is the color of the innocence and purity. Hux laughed then – not to mock Ren but to express that there was nothing pure about him, nothing innocent either. “No heels, just bare feet,” Ren said. “And dress – light, nothing complicated. No make – up either. Just your face, blue eyes and your lips – I will paint them red in no time. Hair messy – without that terrible hair product you are so fond of – your natural curls, soft and wielding under my touch. Blushed cheeks – I'll work on that. No underwear – there will be no need for it.”There was someone dangerous on the ship - someone they thought they could trust. One of his own men - someone Hux met before. He was free now - free to hunt, free to kill. And Hux knew that this man was coming for him.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> warnings: description of a murder scene

It was one of Ren's fantasies. He confessed to Hux shortly after they decided that what was between the two of them could have a name – a relationship of some kind. Ren claimed he didn't have a preference when it came to color. Red or black – maybe even blue to match Hux's eyes or white – because the white is the color of the innocence and purity. Hux laughed then – not to mock Ren but to express that there was nothing pure about him, nothing innocent either. “No heels, just bare feet,” Ren said. “And dress – light, nothing complicated. No make – up either. Just your face, blue eyes and your lips – I will paint them red in no time. Hair messy – without that terrible hair product you are so fond of – your natural curls, soft and wielding under my touch. Blushed cheeks – I'll work on that. No underwear – there will be no need for it.”

“And what will happen then?” wondered Hux, already daydreaming. “What will you do to me?”

Ren pressed against his back, his hands settled atop his hips. A single kiss was pressed against the side of his throat – Hux shivered like he always did when he felt aroused and closed his eyes, mouth already opening but no sound came out. Ren's palm pressed against the center of his chest and the moved towards his left nipple, which was soon encircled by a pair of fingers. Hux arched his back and his bottom pressed against Ren's groin. “I will slip my hand under that skirt of yours,” Ren mumbled and demonstrated his action by opening Hux's pants and moved his thumb between Hux's cheeks, where he pressed it against his twitching rim. “Just like that?” Hux breathed out and moaned. “Just like that,” Ren nodded.

“What then?”

“My, my,” Ren was smiling. “You are eager, boy.” He pushed his finger inside. “You'll have to take more than one finger to be prepared for me. We'll go slowly – I have the entire night to stretch you open. You'll beg me to stop and then you'll beg me for more. I'll push you on your back then – push those dress up to get a better look at you. You'll spread your legs, willingly – “

“And if not?”

Ren kissed him. “I will make you,” he promised. “I'll push your thighs apart – settle between them. You'll say my name – and I will push in.” Hux closed his eyes and his body tensed. Ren leaned closer and whispered into his ear: “Say my name, sweetheart.”

“Kylo – “

That was before. And this is now. The sight if the dress makes his stomach turn upside-down.

Hux stares. The boy's body is lying on the ground in an unnatural position – his legs are spread, hands crooked like twigs. His face is pushed down so Hux cannot see his expression, only rich locks curling around his temples. His clothes are all bloody – and yet Hux can recognize the design. Dress – white. Long to cover up the boy's legs, with its sleeves torn into pieces so the pale skin is revealed. He looks like a girl – soft, pretty and wielding. And dead. That part sends shivers running down Hux's spine. There is no mistake – the blood is soaking through the material of the dress. It's covering the ground and it's in the air – that sweet smell of something rotten. He had to be here for days before they found him – just a bit more and it would be no real body. Just meat and a pile of bones. “Do we know his name?” he asks and kneels down. Phasma by his side hesitates – another Officer grabs the boy's hair to give Hux a better look. Phasma says something – her voice ring through the air like a gunshot and yet Hux hears nothing. His stomach twists – he is no stranger to death and yet he feels sick.

The boy has no eyes. Just a pair of empty holes staring at the General. His spine cracks once the Officer yanks his head back and when he lets go of it, it rolls on the side and the angle is so unnatural that Hux quickly stands up so he doesn't have to look anymore. That's when Ren arrives – _the phantom of the Finalizer –_ Hux thinks with a strange devotion and greets his lover with a quick nod of his head. His black robes curl around his body like mist. Just this morning he was burning in the light – divine and indestructible. Hux turns his head to the side when Ren uses the tip of his boot to roll the boy on his back and looks down. Blood splashes – the body is suddenly not a body but meat. “Who is it?” Ren repeats Hux's question. _It,_ Hux thinks. How easily he turned the boy into a corpse. It and not he. It should not make a difference – and yet it does. Hux's fingers immediately twitch and he twists his lips into a snarl.

“One of the younger cadets, sir,” Phasma says. “Otta Reyal. OTT0017. That's what his tags told us.”

Hux is suddenly too aware of that tags hanging around his neck. That boy was just like young Armitage – a cadet, young and inexperienced. “Why is the corpse wearing those ridiculous clothes?” Ren asks suddenly. “I thought that the cadets were meant to wear uniforms – just like everybody else does.” The uniform makes the soldier – but Hux knows that rules can be bend. Ren doesn't understand – only suspects what Hux already knows. “Of course they are. They all have a uniform issued for them – just like any other Officer aboard my ship,” he snaps. “I want to speak with his friends – I want to know why he was alone, why no one was looking for him. I want to know who did this.” His voice wavers but he's already turning on his heel, so Phasma cannot see his desperate expression. But Ren sees it.

He later catches up with Hux. Grabs his hand and holds him in place. “You are shaking,” he notes and he sounds worried. “Hux.” The mask goes off – like it usually does when Ren deems it's time to talk face to face. His gloves follow and Hux feels Ren's warm fingers brushing his cheeks. He leans into the touch – his body goes slack but when he closes his eyes, he sees the boy's face and the blood. He jerks away and Ren has barely time to grab his forearms and stop him from throwing punches. Ren's mask falls on the floor with a loud crack but neither of them seems to care.

“He wanted to gain favour,” Hux whispers. “They all do – when you are a cadet, your power is limited. You are either smart or ruthless – and those smart end up fucking their superiors.” His cheeks flush in humiliation. “I did the same thing – not that dress of course. I did that only for you but – “ Hux closes his eyes. “I let myself to be used – they are right in a way. I fucked my way up. They all did – but the more power you hold, the more important it becomes.” He is surprised when Ren wraps his hands around his middle and buries his head in the crook of Hux's neck. “That boy is dead,” he whispers. “Do you understand that, Hux?”

Hux blinks. “I felt your anger – your pain. You must not allow yourself to feel for the corpse,” Ren continues.

“Have you seen his face?” Hux gasps. “That bastard who did this didn't just fucking kill a child – he made a monster out of him. Are you even aware of that Ren?” Ren is quiet. His eyes are cold – and Hux knows he doesn't understand.

“We will find whoever who did this,” Ren promises. “But for now – you should not think of it. The boy is dead. This will not happen again, Hux.” He holds Ren's gaze and wonders how can be this man this sure. Hux just nods, already feeling tired. He is not convinced – but he never says that. “Okay,” he mumbles. Ren smiles. The next body is found three days later.


	2. the silent game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: self-harm.
> 
> it's not overly described - but I shall warn you nevertheless.

The scene is not different from their first time. The darkened room – sheets curling around their feet like snakes. Ren's hands settled atop Hux's slender hips and Hux's fingers stroking Ren's jaw. It's impossible to say where one ends and where the other begins. This is love – Hux thinks as he feels as Ren enters him in one push and then stills, waiting for Hux to adjust. And if it's not love – then it has to be something close to love. They exchange a few kisses – just a press of their lips with closed eyes. If Hux wanted to look at Ren at this moment – he would see his pale face and dark hair. The rest of Ren is washed away by pleasure until there is nothing else left.

Ren is filling Hux from inside. He is everywhere around the room too. The air here smells like sweat and blood and something else – the danger that pours from Ren like water. And the darkness. Hux can see it clearly now. It's pulsing underneath Ren's skin and it's glowing. Hux used to fear that darkness – now he feels like it's the only thing that can protect him. The first time they slept with each other was just like this – the slow rolling of the hips, quiet moans filling the corners of the room. The sweat is forming on Hux's forehead. His lips are trembling as he stutters Ren's name and dives into the waves of pleasure. He reaches his peak – it feels like flying – and then he comes down. His body relaxes all while Ren continues moving. Ren presses their foreheads together. “Armitage,” he whispers just a moment before he comes. His seed fills Hux from inside and when he pulls out, it drips on the sheets.

They both are breathing heavily once it's all over. The sheets are cool under Hux's naked body but Ren's hands are warm. They stroke over Hux's navel and chest. “You look debauched,” Ren murmurs. He cannot stop looking at Hux. Hux's hair is messy and his lips are swollen. He looks like a whore – properly used and all Ren needs to do is to stand up and leave. He never does – later he claims that Hux charmed him to stay. Ren rolls on his side and brings Hux's smaller body closer – as if he wanted to protect him and shield him from the things waiting outside.

Hux sighs. He pulls away – Ren expects him to. There is a long pause and the silence fills the room. Hux takes a cigarette from the night table and puts it inside his mouth. He lights it up and forces himself to breathe the smoke in. He turns to Ren and sees the snarl crossing the Knight's features. “What is it?” he mumbles, already feeling irritated. Ren shrugs and his fingers brush Hux's palms – focus on the scarred skin there. Some cuts are fresh but Hux is not in the mood to talk about it. He is nervous – even now – when he should feel sated and satisfied. There are two boys – both of them Cadets. One of them dressed like a whore – the other cut in half, found without his clothes. They remind Hux of his past. He's never played a whore for a long time – or for a couple of different men. But he allowed one of them to fuck him. It's not a thing he is proud of but it was needed to be done. Ren does not understand and Hux cannot make him understand. For now, it's enough that Ren never mentions it. It's their secret – the theme they both are avoiding.

“I thought you quitted smoking,” Ren murmurs, half – asleep.

“I did.”  He is restless and exhausted. Two children are dead – children that were meant to become the part of the Order someday. They are dead now – just two corpses. Ren is indifferent – he doesn't really value life. But Hux sees the matter differently. He feels like the blood is on his hands. He stirs when Ren places his big palm on Hux's cheek.

“You should stop thinking about it.”

“You know I can't.” The smoke burns insides of his mouth. His tongue turns black. “Someone is killing children in the most sadistic way and they will not stop. Have you seen the bodies? They were alive and felt that pain. They both were used like toys and then thrown them away. How can anyone be safe if the Order cannot protect his own? How can we win this war if we are the monsters?”

Ren sighs. He takes the cigarette between Hux's lips and throws it away. Hux frowns, with a remark already forming on the tip of his tongue. In the end, he says nothing. Instead of speaking, he presses his lips against Ren's and smothers them both by the smoke. Ren's hands come to rest on his shoulder and the Knight brings him closer, his tongue brushing Hux's as the kiss continues. Hux feels as heat pools in his stomach. He reaches to find out if he could make Ren hard once more but his hand is swatted away. Ren breaks the kiss and looks at Hux with narrowed eyes. “You should sleep,” he says. He looks concerned for once and Hux finds himself nodding.

He should go to sleep. He managed to work through the past two nights. One more and he will collapse – and Ren seems to know that. He dislikes this – this state when Hux cannot stop thinking. They both can do only a little to stop that. Because every time Hux closes his eyes, he sees those two boys. He sees the blood – the corpses. He feels responsible. Ren sighs by his side and reaches for his hand. Once their fingers touch, shivers run down Hux's spine. Ren's thumb brushes the small cuts already forming on the back of Hux's hands. They both remain silent. And then Ren speaks. “You should stop doing this.” That's all he can do – ask Hux to stop before it's too late. Most of the times, Hux only nods or looks into Ren's eyes and silently promises that it's the last time. The cuts heal and the process of making them repeats. As Hux came to understand, the pain is now a constant part of him. Without that pain, he feels worthless – and empty. Without that pain – he truly has nothing.

“I will stop,” he says into the darkness of the room. It should be comforting – to lie here with Ren by his side, unable to see anything. But it's not. Hux feels like a caged animal. The sheets are holding him down. The darkness is smothering him. “I always stop before it's too late.” Ren disagrees but never says anything. There is no point in arguing – the arguments make things only worse. He rolls on his back and squeezes Hux's hand. “Goodnight,” he says gently. And closes his eyes. It takes another hour before Ren is truly asleep – Hux can tell from his even breaths and relaxed features. He himself cannot bring himself to sleep. So he stares at his lover – at one point even gathers enough courage to brush Ren's hair to the side to see more of his face. Hux is fascinated by the change – how peacefully this man looks while he sleeps. There is no trace of anger – or that cruelty Hux learned to fear as much as to love. Ren will never hurt him – Hux knows that and he believes that. Yet there are those thoughts – twitching fingers, Ren's dark eyes and the blade of the lightsaber so close to Hux's throat – a single movement always follows.

Hux stands up and quietly walks towards the pile of his clothes. He takes out a cigarette from the pocket of his jacket and brings it towards his lips. For now, he will not light it up. He just rams it between his teeth and keeps it there – biting down when he grows frustrated. He moves towards the window with the DataPad in his hand. The blue light makes the darkness disappear. Ren mumbles something from his sleep – but he never wakes up. Hux sighs and sits down on the floor. His face looks paler than usual. His lips are bitten and bleeding. The shadows make him look younger. He reads through is messages quickly, not stopping over them. Hux checks the time – frowns when he sees that tomorrow he will be meeting with Phasma to talk about the dead boys. He is not overly eager to talk about that theme and yet he cannot bear the silence of not speaking about it. He skims through the photographs of the dead – the horrifying scenes with two children lying like broken dolls on the floor. Hux's stomach twists and he pushes the DataPad away and yawns.

He heads to the kitchen next. There he makes a coffee for himself and curls on the chair where he waits till the morning. The coffee makes his heart beat faster and he closes his eyes, listening to the sound of the blood running through his veins. His fingers are shaking – he is sure that it's the result of sleep deprivation. His hair is a mess but he cannot bring himself to stand up and walk into the bathroom to make himself look more human. Instead, he closes his eyes. The caffeine won't let him sleep but he can at least pretend that he had a good night sleep for once. That's how Ren finds him – curled into himself and unmoving. The Knight is silent when he comes closer and his warm fingers brush Hux's hair. The General twitches and his eyes snap open – he looks like a wild animal for a moment. Then he seems to recognize Ren and he calms down almost immediately. Although Ren scowls, he doesn't say anything to address Hux's state.

He says nothing at all until the moment when they are both finally dressed and ready to depart from each other. Hux's lips are shaking but his eyes are sharp. Ren leans to kiss him – he doesn't even seem to be interested in sex this morning. His hands wrap around Hux's waist and slip away only as the part. “They are dead Hux,” Ren says gravely and looks into his lover's eyes – trying to find out if Hux understands him. “They are dead – there is nothing you can do for them.” He presses his dry lips against Hux's forehead. And Hux is unable to answer.

 

_the end of part one._

**Author's Note:**

> I'll add more tags later as the story goes on. It will be a bit darker fic - so if you're not into stuff like that, don't read this story.


End file.
